Manglo totally has like four women I've never met fawning over him on his MySpace page.  I'm not freaking because he doesn't get on MySpace ever, it's just, who ARE these people??  One of them says she misses his voice.....

Life sucks... every time you think you are headed in the right direction another curveball flies in your face...


Raaaar!!

Date:	2007-07-08 08:53
Subject:	Wankiness...
Security:	Public
Mood:	confused

I have a dilemma.... childcare is expensive (thus I keep Heather here for help), but Heather is becoming this raging beast lately.  She yells about nothing, snaps at everything and is all-around not fun to be with.  Example, today I started to do dishes (which is her "chore") and I was taking stuff out of the sink so I'd have a clean sink to start with.  She came out and said that one of the pans wasn't dirty that I was putting stuff into.  I replied that as it was on the counter and not put away, I assumed it was dirty and then I added, wouldn't that make sense to you?  She screamed, I don't make sense, do I?.....
I mean whoa.... 

Date:	2007-07-07 08:06
Subject:	I'm back!! Sort of.
Security:	Public
Mood:	apathetic

After much absence of internet/ money, I have returned.... I will spend time catching up!


I started this whole new job thing across the street.  It's alright so far, but I feel like I could have jumped on the phone and taken calls a week and a half ago... I start taking calls on Monday by myself, so we'll see what happens then.  I walked to work this morning only to come back home by 7:30am, done day... I should have called in dead.  Apparently, within 14 months I can be a CSA3 making $15 plus a 10% bonus over there and I don't have to drive.
Yesterday, my birthday, I went to the store/bank and came home only to biff it at the bottom of the stairs carrying Pepsi and 2 gallons of milk.  I jacked myself up a little bit, but I think I'm gonna live. 
In other news, Holden is gigantic and cute and noisy as HELL.  Leave it to me to reproduce the child with the strongest lungs ever created...

Date:	2007-04-10 18:08
Subject:	Taken from just_tonight
Security:	Public
Mood:	contemplative

We all have things about our friends that make us slightly envious.
Not in a bad way, but in a 'Wow! I wish I had that person's hair/ eyes/ money/ relationship/ toenails/ whatever.'
So tell me what about me makes you envy me. . . then post this in your LJ and see what makes me envious of you.

Date:	2007-04-10 15:02
Subject:	What has Megan been up to?
Security:	Public
Mood:	aggravated

Great question. I know the last time I posted I knew I would be off of work for a bit and I didn't want to spend time on the floor typing and dying from whatever is wrong with me. Lazy me. I was prescribed 12 sessions of massage therapy, an anxiety drug and an anti-inflammatory and sent back to work. I've been onboarding (our equivalent to babysitting/ mentoring) so I havent been near my computer for a while. So here I am... Updates follow

* The baby is huge, he is cruising now (walking along objects) and I'm freakin out that he's going to walk soon, I'm not ready.

* Mingo was laid off from his job a week ago and he is currently looking for another job.

* My Aunt Carol and my best friend's dad passed away within days of each other two weeks ago and that was hard to handle.

* My mom is stressed out because I can't afford anything and she can't help me. My sister says she will help me out if her hubby ever goes back to work (he's been unemployed for four months now!)

* I need to make a rent payment of $1007 on my payday or I think I'll prolly get evicted, no formal eviction yet, but I can't expect much more grace period

* I haven't been able to make a car payment for the last 40 days, so I'm hoping they keep "working with me" and don't take my car.

* I have a note from the DA citing that I wrote a bad check months ago and that if I don't pay for it now, then I face 6 months in jail and a $2500 fine. Aces!!

So, in essence, I've had a lot of things on my mind!!

I'll post pics of the baby soon, I just found my camera that I thought I had lost all the way back in December, so there's at least some good news!! I already have them on my myspace if you'd like to check there. Search me under the email addy legionrus@yahoo.com. I hope things are going much better for all of you!!

Date:	2007-04-10 15:02
Subject:	TrustFlow results for maisbiensur
Security:	Public

I tried out TrustFlow II for LiveJournal. The following people not on the friends list for maisbiensur are close by:

• thrashgrrrl, nothinsacrednic (100 - 150)
• erotic_e, libra_dragon, roundandround2, mollywobblez, mad_kiwi, linda312, dosequisgirl, favorite_child, vbreb2k (150 - 200)
• neoronin01, tiggeriphic (200 - 250)

Created by ciphergoth; hosted by LShift.

TrustFlow II: Who is closest to your friends list?

I was off of work for the past four weeks due to the aforementioned back pain and other worries. I'm so sad that I had to miss all that time... unpaid as of now. I'm so in the hole, it's disgusting!! The bank keeps hosing me too, I have an overdraft, so anytime something pings the account they charge me for it and charge a fee. I don't really understand how that is allowable, it's not like if I try to atm that money out they would give it to me, they just like to make charges...

Sorry that I keep falling off the earth for periods of time. I think I'm getting progressively lazier as I get older. Actually, the truth is I've been mega busy at work lately and my computer at home sits on the floor, so this intense back pain I've been having limits my internet browsing while there. I mentioned it to the doctor and she just asked me questions pertaining to a kidney infection and then moved on. I was kind of surprised that she didn't address it since it was a pretty major concern of mine and I paid $200 to go in!! I'm still debating whether I want to go on a sleep aid or not since I want to sleep better, but I don't want to become dependent on anything! So many decisions! I hope all is well with everyone.

I just wanted to let the world know of my dissatisfaction with the Cingular service. They keep billing an old account with my autopay and then charging me b/c payment is returned. I made the guy verify to me that he changed it this time. Then my text messaging wasn't working so now I am calling back and they say they have to verify that the payment was made to make it work... Uhh... He said when I called, you made your payment today... Raar!! =P

Work is busy too... My boss is going to be gone through Monday and I am out on Tuesday so I am getting coached on a day in the near future. More constructive criticisms.

I totally misplaced my digi camera!! I haven't seen it since Christmas (which makes me sad that I don't have baby's first christmas pics!!) Nobody in my family back in cali seems to have seen it, but I know it didn't make it back to Arizona with me. Obviously someone in Cali has a new camera... jerks.

Holden can crawl now, but only when he has some motivation. Like a cord on the floor or some crayons he wants to eat. Today he crawled at me crying when I tried to leave to come back for lunch. It ate my heart out. I'm glad he's advancing, he was being far too lazy for a little while!! I just took Thursday off because I don't want to have to come into this place. I'm feeling more and more frustration with working lately, I don't want to be here, but I can't call out. I have to plan ahead to be lazy... I wish I could afford to be a stay at home mom.

Date:	2007-02-12 19:03
Subject:	Regrets
Security:	Public
Mood:	frustrated

- I have this huge regret that I didn't get off of my maternity leave butt and apply for the glass rep job that Melissa does. I know my dissatisfaction with my current position has caused attendance problems and now that locks me into this role until August. It makes me sad!!

- That I have my niece effectively raising my child for me. They share a room, she feeds him and plays with him while I'm gone and he even calls her Lala. I just feel like a worthless mom because I don't get as much Mommy/baby time as I'd like. Raar!

- That I didn't focus more on school. I came to Arizona to go to ASU and I wound up getting pregnant and abandoning that. Now, I am focused on getting a child raised and a home paid for so I can't do that without sacrificing more time with Holden.

I am also getting increasingly frustrated with life overall. I'm not sure why, but I find myself getting rather intense bursts of anger that I just bottle up and move on about. I have no idea what is making me so mad, but I feel like I take it out on Mingo a lot and that isn't fair. He does semi treat me like a slave and that gets me upset, but I've been calling him on it lately, so he's trying to be better about it. (In clarification, I mean that he makes me his gopher/ cook/ servant in the way of "Honey, can you do this?" or "Honey can you get me..." or "Honey will you make me...") It frustrates me more when it's something that has nothing to do with me. Like "Honey will you go buy me cigarettes?", that gets me because it's my time, my effort for him completely. I had to go shopping the other day for 4 hours because he was mad at Heather and wanted me to take her somewhere. I don't know about you, but I don't like going out right when I get off work. I want to relax and get the day off my back. I think I need to get a prescription for Ambien or something so I can sleep more soundly and feel less agitated during the day. Maybe I'll call my doctor. Hope all is well with all of you!

I took tomorrow off to sit at home... I'm having a hard time being here today. I did get a raise, so that's nice, but I've just felt stressed out and I think I need another day before I come back to this. Niki told me she was going to coach me tomorrow and I told her I wouldn't be here, so she's going to coach me Wed. at 7:15 am... geez. Or at least sometime soon thereafter. I haven't been coached in a long time. The last time was Scott handing me a piece of paper and that was November. I can't even tell you the last time someone made me listen to my calls. My PE was based on things that Scott said about me over the year, so that's nice. I changed bosses four times after coming back in August, so it's been difficult to get used to any one style of working. Niki says I don't sound too bad and she made me an onboarder, so I have to assume I'm not screwing up too badly.
I need to get a washing machine. I went to get everything in one shot, but it didn't happen that way. I got a tv and living room furniture, but I couldn't afford to pay for laundry stuff too at that moment so I waited. Now I'm running out of clothes and the laundry facilities aren't working. To the laundromat I go I guess. Sigh.
Holden is super clingy and cranky lately. He wants me to carry him everywhere and I fear I am making him into a spoiled brat. I hope I'm not because I loathe mama's boys, but he seems so needy now that he has two teeth and life is hard for him. I just wish he'd get to the non teething, walking and being cute stage already... Just kidding, I'm enjoying every stage as it comes!! I should post more pictures soon, you wouldn't believe how big he is!!

Date:	2007-02-03 10:42
Subject:	Interesting
Security:	Public
Mood:	happy

I fell asleep on the couch last night because Mingo was hanging out in another room with friends and I woke up at midnightish. I then went to bed cause Mingo wanted to play 360 and he never came to bed. Good nights sleep!!! Yay! =P I love my boyfriend and I don't think I could function without him, but his snoring is enough to kill a goat. I did wake up once at like 5 am to snoring from the living room through the door into my room!!! When I got up at 7, he and his friend were laying on different couches snoring their faces off... Sheesh. Who knew guys in their 20s had sleepovers? I just informed him that we pay for electricity, so having game consoles, big screens and 40 lights on is not wise! =P How is everyone else doin??

Date:	2007-01-30 18:06
Subject:	Apartment
Security:	Public
Mood:	chipper

I've gotten pretty much moved in. I just have to go back for some Holden toys, the vacuum and the trash can. I went and got a big screen (why the hey not?) and some furniture yesterday that is supposed to be coming today. I am excited about getting everything set up!
The baby is attempting to crawl now, mostly rolling towards his goals still. Poor little guy keeps bumping his head though and crying! His cry has gotten progressively worse lately, like he is in severe pain, but I think he is just startled by it because if I pick him up he smiles and cuddles me. He's such a spoiled little brat!! I think he is in his separation anxiety stage because he gets mad if I turn away or don't carry him with me everywhere I go. I don't mind comforting him, but it does interfere with moving/ working/ living!!
I hope that furniture gets to my house today, they said it would, but I haven't gotten a call yet. I will have to call and kill people if it doesn't! =P

(Click here to post your own answers for this meme.)

✓ I miss somebody right now.	✓ I don't watch much TV these days.	✓ I own lots of books.
✓ I wear glasses or contact lenses.	✓ I love to play video games.	✓ I've tried marijuana.
✓ I've watched porn movies.	× I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship.	× I believe honesty is usually the best policy.
✓ I curse sometimes.	✓ I have changed a lot mentally over the last year.	× I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.

( it goes on... )

Today is destined to be a good day.  We got the apt. and we are moving in today.  I got my tax return so yay for that!  Also, I don't have to move much cuz I'm at work!!  Way to go Saturdays!!  One down side... I didn't eat breakfast in favor of some food in my desk and ... it's locked and I don't have my key.  BURN!!  I guess I'll get some lunch or something.  Maybe vending machine or something??

Date:	2007-01-20 17:20
Subject:	The stock is dropping....
Security:	Public
Mood:	frustrated

I have lost 2% of my savings year to date on the Progressive stock alone...  What's up with that?  I have diversified my investments so I'm not completely dependent on our stock's performance, but it's still disheartening. 

On another note, we applied for another apt. and I'm very hopeful.  They said as long as things even out everything will be okay.  Meaning, if I have okay credit and his is crappy that I should outweigh him.  I hope I hope.  I need this to happen soon because we need to move next weekend.  The great news is that at this apt. if we pay $844 on move-in that takes care of the last part of January as well as all of February so we wouldn't have to stress it.  Yay!!  I am trying to tentatively set up utilities, but we are having his mom do our electricity since SRP requires insane deposits.... insane.  Like $240 is the "normal" set up fee. 

My family is having this crazy drama right now too... I need to vent it my dearest LJ friends... Ready?  My mom's car was going to get repossessed because it was 2 months past due, her home phone is turned off and there are other financial areas lacking.  This is all because my sis-in-law continues to borrow money for her phantom illness and my aunt and mom continue to shell it out.  I'm told that I'm cynical and they are ashamed of me when I bring up that no one can prove she's sick!!  I mean come on!  If she could show me where she gets IV chemo every DAY... DAY people... doctors give you days off.... let's not even mention that her cancer is "terminal" and she's been alive with it for over a year.  It's a rare form that only 9 people have and her doctor does not exist in California... you cannot find him.  My aunt Cathy swears she has gone to appts. but there is no way she has gone into the room to see what was happening, so how does she know it wasn't a physical??  I'm just pissed that she took advantage of their kindness and got them into so much trouble.  My sister's husband called my older brother to tell him what was going on with mom and he got mad and called my younger brother (married to sis-in-law of evil) who then said he knew nothing about that money.  How do you get $7k and not alert your husband to it?!  I mean, if I had $7k, Domingo would surely be alerted to it.... Ehh, I don't know, sometimes I wish I had been an only child.